And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We don't watch enough power rangers
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
