High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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