She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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