Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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