how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
