Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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