dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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