Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
