Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Tornado booty call.. dedication
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
