I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
