just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
