I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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