she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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