You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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