Say something about gay babies.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
