Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize