we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
