next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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