She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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