At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I've blown a few things in my day
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
