Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
