Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
