google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
