I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
