White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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