Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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