what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
