he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
