Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
