That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
