just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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