Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
we're making bets on your personal life
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize