All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
