i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
