We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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