You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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