But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
