i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
