Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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