currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
