Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
