just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
50% drunk capacity currently
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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