that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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