she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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