Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
