I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
