i need an iv and a liver transplant
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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