the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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