Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
