This girl is more easily done than said...
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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